Jon, Odie, Doc-boy, Grandma, and one lazy cat
By Andrew - December 16, 2003

I've known the Garfield Christmas story for years, but have only recently watched it. You see I have a bunch of Garfield books and within one of these books, somewhere around the 21st or 22nd book, is this Christmas story. But I'm here to review the TV special, and not some book. It's not a well known fact that I don't know how to read.

We join our heroes on Christmas Day, although they're not really heroes since they have no foes to battle to the death. Jon wakes Garfield and surprisingly Garfield doesn't have a witty line about sleeping. This is clue number one. Jon then gives Garfield about thirty lasagnas that lead him to the Christmas tree. This is clue number two. Also, Jon is wearing some sort of elf costume. Now, I wouldn't put it past the guy to put something like this on, but on the other hand it's really a little too fruity even for Jon. This is clue number three. Jon gives Garfield the best gift anyone could imagine. It's a chair with a scary Santa face on the back rest that'll give you anything you wish for. It's kinda like a holodeck except you can take your wishes anywhere. This is the fourth and final clue. Clues leading to what? Well this is too good to be true, so what is it? That's right, it's a dream. We're really gonna spend the entire Christmas special at the damn Arbuckle farm.

On the way to the farm, Jon starts to reminisce about the old days, and there's even a flashback with a song. That never happened in the book. At the farm we do the whole meet and greet. It's really your standard fare. I mean, anything you would do, if you're normal, when you'd arrive at your holiday destination. We meet Jon's mom, dad, and Doc-boy right at the door. Yet there's someone missing from the picture, someone old, a bit cynical, and tough as nails.

Of course it's Grandma. The first thing she does is elbow Jon in the stomach, something I think we've all wanted to do. Then she goes and puts chilli powder in the sausage gravy, and, when you're in a cartoon, putting chilli powder into things is completely badass.

Odie is up to something, which is surprising due to the fact that Odie has about as much in the head as your average brick. But it's almost time for the Christmas feast so we can't worry about things like this any longer. Time to eat!

At the table Mom asks Doc-boy to say grace. And he does so, for about two hours. After that piece of showmanship is finished, they dig in. Grandma, having befriended Garfield, gives him full plates of food under the table. Oh what mischief! What well happen next!? She says that she's eating for two now and sufficiently frightens the whole table into submission. After the meal Jon offers Garfield the left-overs and in a surprising change of pace, Garfield refuses. Of course he's already had enough food to feed a small third world country, but on the other hand that cat is a horrible glutton.

Putting up the Christmas tree is something that my family does on Remembrance Day (Veteran's Day for you Americans). It may seem a bit early, but if you consider that the mall has had its decorations up since two days past Thanksgiving, which is in October here, it's not that bad. I never got this idea that you'd put up the tree a couple of hours before Christmas Day. The Arbuckles, however, put up the tree on Christmas Eve.

Doc-boy then tries to play and sing a Christmas song on the piano, and it's bad. Really bad. Grandma takes over, and what does she do? She rocks the house. After she's done, Mom takes over and everyone joins in for another song. In fact, I think more than everyone joined in. I'm not sure how good Lorenzo Music was at harmonizing, but there's definitely more than the usual cast involved with this song.

The next part is the tear jerker sequence of the special. If I hadn't had my tear ducts replaced with lazerz I might just have gotten a tad bit misty eyed here. As it stands I need to call someone that knows about fixing walls. Grandma tells the story of her husband and how he was a man without emotion, except on Christmas. I'm really not doing the story justice. This is one sequence that I think you just need to watch.

Remember when I said Odie is up to something? Well, here he is in the barn making something. At first it seems illogical and stupid, but it's a gift that every cat would want. What is it? You're just gonna have to keep reading! Also, Garfield sneaks in to see what Odie is up to only to find the perfect gift for an old, lonely lady.


Christmas day at the Arbuckle farm starts off everyone opening their gifts. Jon has apparently gotten a crappy red sweater, and Doc-boy has gotten a toy airplane. How old is this guy? He's gotta be in his twenties right? And he's getting toys for Christmas? But then again, I'm in my twenties and if you take a look at my wishlist, it's not much better. Even just taking a look around my desk you'll find I've got more Transformers than a power station. So I take it back. Doc-boy can play with his airplane. Dad's hat is funny because it's bigger than a regular hat. Mom got squat.

If you didn't figure it out from my incredibly obvious hint above, Garfield gives Grandma old love letters that Grandpa wrote a long time ago. That's ingenious for a couple of reasons. The first one being Garfield gets massive brownie points with Grandma because it reminds her of good times. Secondly, it cost Garfield nothing, not a cent. Really you're just giving a gift that was given to the same person in the past again! And they're happy with that? I guess so.

Oh, and before we draw this to a close; what did Odie give Garfield that every cat wants?

A back scratcher. Oh yeah, that hits the spot.

And so with that we end our trip through the Garfield Christmas Special. No matter what I have said in this article to the contrary, I do like this special a lot. We laughed, you cried, it's an all around good special.

Remember: "It's not the giving, it's not the getting, it's the loving." - Garfield.


AIM: Terrahawk X
E-Mail: andrew@ninjacultr.com

Read Pop Rocks and Coke's Article of this classic special!

Guess what! Buy me stuff for Christmas and I'll probably write a 5000 word essay on how you're awesome.

To my cable company: Listen, you took away my Spike TV. Now, I know that the channel is stupid, but it also has MXC which is a brilliant show in it's own right. And what did you replace it with? SpeedVision. As much as I like watching cars go around in circles 24 hours a day, I can do without the screensaver channel. I do approve your choice to include Prime in our cable package. I'll never get tired of watching old reruns of Golden Girls. But as far as Spike goes, why not put it on the unused channel 18? Or if you're still worried about getting complaints, why not hide it on channel that only you and I know about? It'll be our little secret.

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